Charity Itself Can Become a Problem

ईश्वरः – निरुपाधिकं ऐश्वर्यं अस्येति ईश्वरः – the name Ishwara here is connected to aiswarya. His aiswarya is unconditional, independent of anything else. His aiswarya is self-sustained. No one has to give it to him. No one has to support his aiswarya. Hence he is Ishwara.

ईश्वरः सर्वभूतानां हृद्देशेऽर्जुन तिष्ठति।
भ्रामयन्सर्वभूतानि यन्त्रारूढानि मायया
– Bhagavad Gita

This Ishwara is at the heart of every being, and sitting there, he runs them, operates them like a yantra – like a robot.

He controls them like a robot. He switches them on and off whenever he wants. He increases their speed or decreases their speed as and when he wants. He moves them around as he pleases. That is why he is called Ishwara.

What all functions this robot should perform – he only decides. What are the features – he only decides. How and when to put those features to use – he only decides.

Lord is telling Arjuna, you are only a robot. I am controlling you from inside. I am operating you from inside. I am commanding you from inside.

This should be clear in the mind and this should eventually lead into surrender.

तमेव शरणं गच्छ सर्वभावेन भारत।
तत्प्रसादात्परां शान्तिं स्थानं प्राप्स्यसि शाश्वतम्

This clarity alone can give peace. This clarity alone can give parama pada.

But when this clarity is not there, then it is a problem.

When you think that these are my capabilities, these are my skills, these are my abilities, this is my knowledge, I am smart, I am special – then it is a problem.

Now this is all the more in spirituality – I know Gita, I can chant Gita, I have understood Gita, come to me if you want to learn Gita.

My kundalini has awakened, now I get those divine experiences – this is a problem.

But this ego also doesn’t go away easily. The more you try to suppress it, the stronger it becomes.

When you try to become humble, modest, simple – that itself later becomes your ego – see how simple and humble I am, why can’t others be like me – this is a problem.

The elite who makes it a point to sit on the floor and have food with the common man – that becomes his ego. He gets this photo clicked and circulated in social media.

Everything, every act of so-called charity becomes a problem – I feed the poor on all Saturdays, I feed cows, I keep water for the pigeons, I take free food to the hospitals.

All of these – all these which are supposed to expand you beyond your individual self – eventually if you see, become a source of ego. They, instead of lightening your ego, start strengthening your ego. This is what happens most of the time.

You try to expand beyond yourself through these acts, but your ego becomes even bigger than that.

You have to be aware of this fact.

Your self-centeredness reduces, you start thinking about others, nature, you start thinking beyond your family, have concern for more – good.

But while doing so, your ego also grows.

You have to be aware of this. You act humble, but if you peep inside yourself, you will mostly realize that it is only an act – an acting.

I am above board – this itself becomes your ego.

You have to be aware of this.

There is only one way to avoid this – you have to understand that whatever you are doing is not done by you. You are only a robot which wouldn’t run without the power supply, which wouldn’t run without the CPU inside.

So if you see yourself as someone special, doing something special, attribute it to Sri Hari who is inside. The credit should go to him. You have no power of your own, no skill of your own, no feelings of your own, no capabilities of your own – they are all his.

When you get appreciated, when you get rewarded, understand that it is not you – it is Sri Hari who is getting appreciated, being praised.

This is the only way to get rid of this ego.

But who gives you such an understanding? Even that is given by Sri Hari.

If you are able to understand what I am saying – even that is by his mercy.

If you are not able to – that means he has yet to show his kindness to you.

Open yourself more to him. Surrender yourself more to him.

What about demon kings like Ravana, Hiranyakashipu, Hiranyaksha?

They all had huge egos.

And the Lord, by killing them, did not kill their physical bodies.

Physical bodies are just capsules.

They were all huge, enormous egos encapsulated in some form of physical bodies.

So, the Lord did not kill them. He killed those big egos.

He destroyed those big egos.

So, it was an act of kindness by the Lord.

Paritranaya sadhunam – is just another way of looking at it.

He did it to protect the good.

But the fact is that he was also showing kindness to them by destroying their egos along with their physical bodies.

His maya is very strange.

When someone is helping us – he makes us feel that ‘oh he is helping me.’

When we are helping someone – he makes us feel that ‘I am doing something for him.’

But when the truth is that every help is rendered by him, he is behind every action – he hides himself. He doesn’t lay claim to anything.

This is his strange way. This is his leela.

He makes us feel that X has helped me. He is so nice. But he doesn’t reveal that sitting inside X, controlling X, prompting X – in fact he is the one who has helped.

He doesn’t reveal this easily. Otherwise, the fun of the game will be lost.

This game is his entertainment. The fun of his game will be lost.

He gives everything – the body, the mind – every single thing is given by him. They are not yours. But he doesn’t reveal this easily. You are only using them for some time.

But then you start thinking that – I am smart, my legs are strong, I am a good athlete, my body is beautiful, I am a good model, I am a good artist, I have a good voice, I am a good singer.

In fact, none of these are yours. They are all his. He only enables and controls all of them.

This should be understood.

He is only playing around with everything.

That’s what Bhagavan told Arjuna:

मयैवैते निहता: पूर्वमेव
निमित्तमात्रं भव सव्यसाचिन्

All these people – Bhishma, Drona – all of them whom you are hesitating to face in battle, hesitating to kill – I have already killed them all. You only be a nimitta here, be my instrument here. This decision is taken by me. It is also implemented by me. I am only making it happen through your body. As simple as that.

Understand this. Sri Hari is telling Arjuna.

• If Ishwara runs everything from the heart, why should I act at all?

  • Because action is obedience. You become the instrument. Results belong to him; effort belongs to you.

• Does surrender make a person passive or weak?

  • No. Surrender removes vanity and fear, so you work faster, cleaner, and with steadier nerves.

• How do I know my charity has turned into ego food?

  • You feel restless without praise, irritated when unseen, and tempted to post every act online.

• What is the quick antidote when ego rises after doing good?

  • Inward handover: ‘Not mine, yours.’ Then do one small task anonymously the same day.

• Can I keep humility without faking it?

  • Yes. Speak less about yourself, credit others, and track slips honestly in a nightly two-line journal.

• If God is the doer, what exactly is my role in family duties?

  • Be the nimitta. Cook, clean, earn, teach, and say ‘for you, Bhagavan’ before starting each task.

• What health gain comes from the instrument mindset?

  • Cortisol drops, breath deepens, recovery from stress speeds up. Body stops bracing for applause or blame.

• How do I serve without turning service into a stage?

  • Small, repeatable, invisible acts: refill water, return calls, sit with the sick, pay on time, keep the mandir clean.

• What should I do when a good deed backfires and people still complain?

  • Stay courteous, fix what you can, and keep moving. Praise or blame does not change the owner of the work.

• How can a family keep seva pure together?

  • Rotate chores, keep names off donations, and review one shared value weekly: truth, cleanliness, punctuality.

• What is a clean mental cue before any action?

  • ‘I offer this. Use me.’ Ten silent seconds anchor attention and switch off vanity.

• How do I teach children the instrument idea without heavy talk?

  • Ask them to do one hidden help daily. At night, thank the unseen helper out loud, not the child’s name.

• How do I handle a relative who flaunts giving?

  • Do not mock. Model quiet giving. If asked, say, ‘we are trying anonymous service; it keeps us honest.’

• What is the sign that pride is shrinking for real?

  • You can accept correction without burning inside, and you sleep easily after a tough day.

• How do I align office work with surrender without losing ambition?

  • Set clear goals, execute hard, and attribute wins upward. Ambition becomes excellence minus ego.

• What is the daily practice that dismantles ego fastest?

  • Morning and night, three breaths with the name, then one unadvertised act of help.

• How to guard charity from turning into control over people?

  • Give and release. No strings. If advice is needed, keep it brief and kind.

• What to do when guilt appears for past showy charity?

  • Apologize in the heart, switch to silent giving, and keep going. Guilt is not a project; correction is.

• How do I respond when success tempts me to say ‘I did it’?

  • Say ‘thank you’ to people, ‘all credit to him’ in the heart, and return to the next duty.

• What is a bedtime close that seals the day in surrender?

  • Lights low, six slow breaths, simple line: ‘All today was yours.’ Sleep on the right side.

Ramaswamy Sastry and Vighnesh Ghanapaathi